Dating is not what it used to be. With the blossoming of social media, dating has taken a strange turn. Dating lost its mystique. Before, you would meet a girl, ask her out, and not know anything about her until you met her on Saturday night with a bouquet of flowers. However, now, before you meet, each of you google each other's names, find every social media platform the other is on and know more about them then they would prefer to reveal before you even meet again. That is, if you've even met before. Many people ask each other on dates through social media and their only knowledge of the other person is what's perceived through the internet.
If you're single and in the dating world, you want to make the best of every date. As gentlemen, we should treat every date special and respect everyone we meet. Here are some tips for the new millennium of dating.
Keep It Face to Face
Yes it's extraordinarily easy to poke your crush on Facebook or like her photo on Instagram. It's even easier to send them a message asking them out. You think to yourself, "easy, I don't have to deal with the rejection if they say no, they can just not respond." Although that sounds good in theory. Consider that it's a cowardly move. Women don't want to be asked out in such an informal way. If you really like a girl and you would like to take her out, find her, look her in the eye, and ask her out. Courage can go a long way.
More so, don't have long interactions through the internet of via text. If you like someone, you should be able to spend a lot of time together. Keep your interactions limited other than face to face time. This allows both of you to grasp a better idea of who the person is without the cloak of technology. If the person you like insists on interacting more through the internet than face to face, consider liking another person. Usually, this means they're not very interesting people anyway.
The best way to keep mystique is to not play games via the internet. If you have social media profiles, set them to private and try to keep information limited. Make your date want to see you in the flesh. Don't let them have the luxury of knowing everything about you before they even talk to you. Keep an air of mystery.
When you are together, you don't have to tell your date your entire life story. If you really like someone and they like you, you'll have a long time to get to know each other. Stay reserved, answer any questions, but mainly try and keep light conversation moving that reveals only bits of each other's life to the other.
The First Date Like the Tenth
Although I'm sure it scores you a lot of points if you take your date to a fancy dinner in a limo ride with champagne. But if that's going to empty your wallet for the next two weeks, it's not worth the trip. It feels great to have spectacular nights, but they should be saved for more special occasions. When first dating someone, you need to be yourself. The best way of doing that is to treat your first few dates as you would treat a date with a girlfriend 3 months in the future. If your favorite place to eat is a small taco shop, then take your date to the taco shop. I know, it sounds ridiculous, but you need to show that person who you are. You shouldn't have to impress them by throwing money away. If you're meant to be with them, they'll love that taco shop. Then a year down the line, you can celebrate your relationship with a limo ride. First, just appreciate each other.
Keep Friends Away
Although it is important that your date can get along with your friends, it's much more important that they get along with you. Try to keep your friends out of the first few dates. Often it feels less intimidating for a date if there are a few friends along, hers or yours, but ultimately, it distracts you from getting to know each other. Even though someone can see exactly how the other acts in a more social situation, inside jokes, references to unknown people, and general conversation can get lost on the person not in the group of friends. There's a time and place for dates with friends, but not until you really know you like someone.
Take It Slow
In such a fast-paced world, many of us want all satisfaction immediately. But the best things in life take time. This is especially important for dating. You cannot expect to fall in love after one date. Although you may think you really like someone and want to take things fast, it's always better to go slow. Our minds can fool us, especially men's minds. Love is often confused with lust and this is a dangerous game when playing with a woman's heart. For your sake and hers, wait to ask her to stay the night, don't call her the minute after the first date, and take your time getting to know her. You might find that after three dates you really can't stand a person. If you jumped too quickly into things, you might be breaking a heart that could have gone untouched.
If you follow these tips, you'll find yourself more satisfied with your dates and the people you're seeing. Try them out and tell us what you think!